Opening Up + Finding My Tribe

There are a few things about me that do not need to be said. One, I really want to start a family. Two, I am shy, awkward and often reticent. It has become increasingly obvious that in order for the first to happen, I have to somehow conquer the latter. Let me share something with you. 

I suffer from fertility issues. I’m sure, by now, you were able to gather that. I’m often shy about a lot of things but I was never shy of my grief or my love for the two children I lost. But, I have never been able to allow myself to really say it to many people out loud. Having a baby does not come easy for me. And because of that, I have to see fertility doctors. I have been for three years. Wow. 

In this struggle, It has also become clear that a family can be made in many ways. One way in particular is adoption. But, (yes another but) adoption costs money. Money that is worth it but it still cost money. Money that we don’t have lying around. We have always had a heart for adoption so, it is a journey we look forward to. We are still able to get pregnant, we’re not a lost cause on that front, but why not give another little life a home full of so much love to give? We are a long way away from that path but it is one that we are eager to take with our whole hearts.

So why am I telling you all of this? Firstly, many of you have been so incredibly kind to us during these difficult times in our lives. Secondly, we really need your help. No, I’m not asking you for money. I’m asking that maybe you might want to be in my tribe. 

We love our friends and family but unfortunately, our circle is small. Very small. 

You know the saying “It takes a village to raise a child”? Well, I am in need of a Tribe before the child comes along. It sounds very needy, I know, but there is such a sadness in loneliness and the journey toward parenthood is so lonely for me. I don’t have a tribe rooting for me. I don’t have people ready to pick me up when I fall. There are a few of you ladies who have responded to my troubles the minute it hits social media, you know who you lovelies are. I’m just asking for a tribe to cheer along side me. I will be forever be thankful.

Are you ready to be a part of my tribe?

To sound like a broken record, fertility doctors and adoption cost money. It is something we are willing to work for and we thought, why not make money in ways that we love? I’m planning to start a new online store specifically to fund our happy future. The name of the store will be called i love you too. I’ll give more details as I start the process but this is where my tribe comes in. 

I have very little self-esteem. I am riddled with self-doubt. I’m not really sure why but it’s a crippling habit that has prevented me from being great. Can you help me? Whether it be words of inspiration or resources to aid me in building my self-esteem. I feel like I am making a very important step by reaching out and asking for help. I want to be able to offer my children a village and I would be proud to have you be a part of it. I know that it will required me to do a lot of growing and to be very diligent so that I can offer myself as a worthy person to fight along side of. 

I am willing. I ask, are you?

14 thoughts on “Opening Up + Finding My Tribe

  1. Joy, I think you may already have a tribe. You just don’t know it yet.

    I’m happy to be apart of that tribe. I’ll always root for you, and I think starting a shop to raise funds is a wonderful idea. You’re a very talented person and you create beautiful products. But if you ever need someone to remind you of this, just send me a message and I’ll be your personal cheerleader.

    I have faith that this will be a good year for you.

  2. 100 times Yes!!!!

    You have my support and all the good vibes and love I can muster. Sending them your way!
    Never feel bad for reaching out, because you will definitely find what you’re looking for. I look forward to seeing your store grow and can’t wait to purchase a product you put so much love into making.
    And if you’re interested, we could also do a collab with Mind-Speaks!

  3. Aww…*hugs* First I’m sorry about all these things you’ve had to go through. Second I think it’s wonderful you want to adopt!

    The store sounds like an awesome idea! Can’t wait to see it! You can do it! Go go!

  4. I’m always rooting for you and am here for you, Joy! I can’t wait to see what you’ll have in your store, and I think that’s a great idea. Good luck with it! You know how to message me if you ever need to talk about anything 🙂

  5. YES YES YES YES. I agree with Holly, I am sure you will find that many people are here for you and want to support you. 😀 I know that I am and I look forward to supporting you in any way I can. 🙂

  6. Loving this new layout!

    You are so brave for opening up about this Joy. I am honestly so proud of how far you’ve come. You’re the sweetest soul I’ve ever met and I only want the best for you. You deserve so much happiness, so much love, so much of everything. <3

    Thank you for sharing this with us and I would love to be a part of a tribe. You know I always be there for you, you're biggest freaking cheerleader.

  7. Yes girl, yes!!!!! I’ve got your back! I want to share in your happiness and I want you to reach out if you want to tell me something really awesome, something that made your day, even the tiniest thing, or even just send me a note to say you’re mad about something that happened or upset that something didn’t work out the way it planned.

    I know it’s hard to open up, and I absolutely know that feeling of being lonely. Especially when you might not have anyone to turn to in real life, and your online friends seem like such darlings, and they give you solace. Some people post their feelings on social media with a simple “I need a hug”, and often people think they’re attention seeking, right? And people stay quiet and offer nothing. Some people need encouragement and they vocalise their struggle in the hopes of getting some encouragement. But Joy, the fact that you wrote this, that you are asking for help, is a strong, honest move. And I’m going to tell you that I’m going to give you that encouragement you need. I’ve experienced hardship where I just need someone to give me a few words of encouragement and support, and that’s it – it’s sometimes all I need to keep me plodding along. And if you’re going to need that on the regular, then don’t be afraid to ask for it.

    I’m with you, and I love you too. ♥️♥️♥️

  8. Joy, whichever decisions you end up making, always backing you up. I respect that you keep on trying and are willing to find different ways without giving up. I’m happy that you’ve been opening up and sharing things that we wouldn’t know otherwise. Sending you lots of love, Joy, always! :)♥

  9. Joy, know that whatever you do, I’ll definitely support you. I know things been rough last year, but I think it will be better this year for you in many ways. You have so many talents, and I know you can put them to good use in this new plan. You are wonderful — never forget that. <3 And know that I am part of your tribe! ^^

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